Why Can’t We All Be Friends?

A few days ago, I published a statement something like “Why can’t we all be friends?” I got a little push back on it, something about White supremacy, I think.

There are a couple of blogs in here about stereotyping and I won’t repeat that here, but the tendency to stereotype people contributes heavily to our inability to be friends. White people will approach a Black man as if he represented everything the White person ever heard or believed about “Black people.” Likewise, a Black person approaching a White person. Some would have you believe that all White people are white supremacists, or that all Black people are violent.

If you know of some Democrats who have lied about something, that doesn’t make all Democrats liars. Same for Republicans. If there are cops who are abusive toward Black people, it doesn’t mean Cops are all racists. If some Black Lives Matter advocates have looted and burned stores, it doesn’t mean Black Lives Matters supporters are all rioters.

Our granddaughter Rachel loves to call her Granny on her new phone and talk on and on about whatever. Yesterday Granny couldn’t talk so Rachel called me. We got to reminiscing about a song we once learned together awhile back. I was teaching some older teens how to lead songs in our a Capella group. One of the things I needed them to understand was that if you are going to lead singing regularly, you need to be able to make a fool of yourself and just plow on, unaffected. Toward that end we all performed “All God’s Creatures Got a Place in The Choir” for the rest of the church after services one Sunday morning. We all made fools of ourselves and considering that done, we would not be embarrassed by mistakes we might make as we led the singing for the church.

The song, “All God’s Creatures…”, has a message very similar to one presented in 1 Corinthians 12:12-27 where Paul writes that we are all a part of the body, yet we are all different. We all have different roles. We can no more get along without one member than a body could easily go on without a hand or an eye.

“All God’s creatures got a place in the choir,
Some sing low, some sing higher,
Some sing out loud on the telephone wire,
Some just clap their hands, or paws or anything they got there.”

 Why can’t we all be friends?

 

Race and Fear

I have read a lot of books about race, written by honest people earnestly trying to understand and to explain the racial tensions in America and the world. Ever since I wrote one, people have frequently recommended others to me. Until now I have read a lot of them. But I have hit the wall on them. They are becoming more alike.

The most recent two or three have used the method of redefining a common term and then building their whole book on their redefinition. I blogged about that a few weeks ago. I really don’t like that method of argument. It seems unfair.

I don’t like the “all people are racist” approach either. Maybe we are, but it is to strikingly different degrees. And to argue that we are all alike, bringing the white supremacist into the camp with the modern progressive, just muddies the issues.

But here is why I am writing about it today. In one of my more recent conversations on the topic I had an epiphany that I want to share with you. Maybe you have known this for a long time, but realizing it answered a lot of questions for me. The root of all racism is fear.

 

Black people are understandably afraid of White people, especially cops. White people have long been afraid of Black people, hence the chains and the brutal treatment. White people are afraid of immigrants and refugees. That fear drives us not to want to mix. We didn’t want “our” kids going to school with “those kids.” The Black families are afraid of how their children will be treated and the White families are afraid of the Black culture. “Those” people will take “our” jobs. The beat goes on.

If we are going to solve the race issues, brother and sister, we must get past the fear. And the only cure for fear is knowledge. If you are afraid of roller coasters or Ferris wheels, you are going to have to ride some roller coasters and Ferris wheels to get over it. If you are afraid of airplanes, you will have to get in an airplane to find the cure.

If you are afraid of a Black neighborhood, you must spend some time in one to get past it. And if you have a deep-seated fear of people of a different color, you need to spend some time with a few. We must become friends. Not passing acquaintances, real friends. You have to spend enough time with someone of a different race that you become comfortable enough to discuss your fears and for them to tell you about theirs. It will be hard work.

More of Alex's Birthday

You may notice that there are two birthday cakes here, plus some donuts, and at least three sets of clothes. That's how we do birthdays. Don't ask why. There is the occassion of the birthday itself, then the "family" gathering, and the next Sunday morning meeting of the church - not necessarily in that order. These are:

1. Alex lighting the first cake...

2. Gathered with friends and family...

3, Uncle Mark lighting the second cake...

4 Posing uncomfortably at church function in his honor...